I had counseling last night. During our conversation, I said something that started with “I should have…” and she stopped me mid-sentence. She said “Shoulds cause guilt. Instead try saying something like “It would be in my best interest to”….”
As we went on through the session, I caught myself saying “I should have…” several times. I had no idea that I used that phrase so much. It’s one of those automatic thought processes that needs to be interrupted and changed. Now that I am aware of it, I’m going to be watching for it and trying to reframe my thinking.
Listen to what you say to yourself today. Are you saying “I should have…” a lot? How could you re-word it and retrain your brain?